Campaign Update & 028 Special Agent Fleishman at Haphazard House (Agent Amanda Story)

Good Morning Ted and Jody:

I had an email exchange with a good friend from IU (we played a lot of bridge back then).  He wished me luck and said he was going to look up my opponent to see what I had to contend with.  I replied “It is a piece of cake as she only won by 62% of the vote last time.  Since turnout was less than 100% there is a lot of play in the solidness of her numbers.”  I tried to add a smiley face, but my email wouldn’t hear of it—bummer.

I have a good draft of the Constitutional Amendment.  David, a former student, worked over my first draft and I only added a few words to his version.  I think this or something very close to it will end up in the hopper in 21 months if I manage to pull off a miracle: No person, corporation domestic or foreign shall give money or anything of value to a candidate for office in the United States, or office holder in the United states or committee or person advocating a candidacy or ballot issue.  No candidate for public office be allowed to spend more than $250 of his or her own money or allocate other things of value for a political campaign.  All campaigns for office and ballot issues will be funded only by monies appropriated by Congress for election campaigns. Congress shall allocate funds by class of office with all candidates receiving equal amounts for a given office based on the number of registered voters in the jurisdiction of the office.  Both sides of a ballot issue will be allocated equal amounts based on the number of voters in that jurisdiction.  All monies not authorized from the Treasury by the Congress for election campaign and allied activities shall constitute a felony and be punishable by such imprisonment and fines as Congress shall establish by law.

Another former student is going over my statement to democratize money ($1667 monthly stipend to every citizen of voting age).  I got it down to 325 words. I hope Chris can put some clarity into it.  He has my democratize money blog for more reference.   Then I have an 850-word biography and statement that needs both cleaning up and a short version.  That I am still working on myself.  There are petitions to impeach the pestilence around,  I will find one I like and use that one for meetings.   I go to the Democratic Central Committee of Cowlitz Country this evening.  I still have to start a web site and twitter account, open a campaign account in the Credit Union, talk to the State Election “umpires,” and file organizational papers.

On Friday, in a beginning salvo to clean up my act for public appearances, I got a haircut (OK a trim.  I still have a pony tail.  Can a left wing Congressional Candidate in a solidly Republican Congressional District in the Pacific Northwest keep a pony tail?).  I need to remember to get a haircut every two weeks and shave every day.   While at the barber shop, a young boy was going through the ordeal.  I snapped a photo of his ordeal and then ran the photo through a couple of filters20170303_144332 c the hair cut email.jpg (“posterize” and paint dabs) to try to make him unrecognizable.  It is attached.

Nancy has a brief bout with vertigo again this morning.  These onslaughts seem to be unpredictable.  This coming Thursday’s visit with the ENT can’t come any too soon for her (or me).

Nancy and I made a mincemeat pie this afternoon.  I 20170305_160854 email.jpgkeep doing things wrong, so we will just have to eat this one and try again. (Another attachment)

Warmest regards, Ed

028 Special Agent Fleishman at Haphazard House

Fiction in 1087 words by T. Edward Westen, 2017


Standing outside 1475 Broadway on Monday, January 6, 2025, Special Agent Fleishman figured it was long enough after the Holiday week that someone might be back to work at Haphazard House Publishing, Inc. Entering the building he found a building directory tat located the business office on the 15th floor.  Looking around, the main lobby seemed to be busy for a normal business day, but then ‘I don’t know what normal is for this year and a publishing firm,’ he though.  None-the-less he walked to the bank of elevators in the center of the lobby and pushed the up button.

The elevator doors opened to a reception area on the 15th floor.  At the reception/information desk he handed the young woman seated there a card and said “I am Anderson Fleishman with Fleishman and Fleishman.  We are executors of a will in which one of your authors is bequeathed a small sum of money in appreciation of our late client’s hours of joy in reading Melissa Hickson’s stories to her great grandchildren and great-great grandchildren.  The problem is we don’t know her address.  Indeed, attempting to locate her we have found 63 Melissa Hickson’s in the greater metropolitan area, none of whom are writers of children’s stories. Before going to the expense of doing a national search, one of our interns suggested checking with you, her publisher.  So, can you help us with an address for her?”

“I’ll have to have you talk to our Vice President for Business Affairs,” replied the young woman.  She picked up the telephone handset on her desk, punched a button and waited.  “Sally, this is Frita, a gentleman here needs information about one of our authors.  Is Vice President Foster available?”  Frita listened for a moment, cupped her hand over the mouthpiece and said, “He is in a meeting until 3:30.  Can you come back then?”

“Yes, I will be back at 3:30,” replied Special Agent Fleishman, “Thank you very much.”  He went to the bank of elevators, got into an empty one.  After the doors closed he disappeared.

At 3:28, Special Agent Fleishman exited the elevator on the 15th floor and walked to the reception desk.  He smiled and said, “Anderson Fleishman to see Mr. Foster.”

Frita said, “Yes, I remember.”  She picked up the phone on her desk, pushed a button and said, “Vice Presient Foster’s Three O’clock is here.”  She listened for a moment and then hung up.  His secretary will be out for you directly.  Please have a seat” she said as she gestured to the chairs and sofas arranged in the reception area. 

Special Agent Fleishman nodded and sat in an overstuffed chair covered in what he presumed was either cowhide or fake leather.  It had the smell of leather.  As he was mentally processing the smell of leather, a young woman marched up to him and said, “Mr. Fleishman, Vice President Foster will see you now.  Please walk this way.”

“Thank you,” replied Agent Fleishman followed and watched the woman walk ahead of him. He thought, ‘I hope she didn’t mean it literally, or I would probably throw a hip out of joint.  And to think she can do that on high heels.’

The young woman stopped before a door, opened it and used her right hand to indicate Special Agent Fleishman should enter.  As he stepped through the door a tall, well-tanned, fit man got up from behind a desk and met Special Agent Fleishman, hand outstretched saying, “Simmons Foster, Mr. Fleishman.  Sally,’ he said. Pointing to the door he had just entered, “gave me your card.  How can I help you?”

Shaking Simmons Foster’s hand, Special Agent Fleishman, said, “As I explained to your receptionist this morning, Fleishman and Fleishman are executors of a will in which one of your authors is bequeathed a small sum of money in appreciation of our late client’s hours of joy in reading Melissa Hickson’s stories to her great grandchildren and great-great grandchildren.  The problem is we don’t know her address.  Indeed, attempting to locate her we have found 63 Melissa Hickson’s in the greater metropolitan area, none of whom are writers of children’s stories. Before going to the expense of doing a national search, one of our interns suggested checking with you, her publisher.  So, can you help us with an address for her?”

“Fleishman and Fleishman, How is it I have never heard of your firm?” asked Vice President Foster.

“We only have the one client,” replied Special Agent Fleishman.

“Since you are executing her estate, don’t you mean had?” replied Vice President Foster.

“We represent the family,” clarified Special Agent Fleishman.

“Sort of like Tom Hagen represented only one client,” suggested Vice President Foster with a smile on his face and laughter in his eyes.

“Exactly,” replied Special Agent Fleishman who was thinking ‘I never thought watching those ancient movies would help me bluff someone.’  He mentally chuckled. ‘They do serve to teach me about mannerisms, speech patterns and how to be a sexist when it comes to opening doors for women.  Watch the movies and eat the food for two weeks; and, one becomes a consigliere to a non-existent dead godmother. Where else but in the ATI?’  He inwardly chuckled again. ‘I do love my job.’

Vice President Foster was making a joke about the Godfather movie.  The word ‘Exactly,’ was the last thing he expected in return to his joke.  The smile left his face and the laughter his eyes.  Special Agent Fleishman took note of the beads of sweat forming on the man’s forehead and the stunned look on his face that replaced the smile and laughter and added with his own smile, “But, my older brother has the title.”

Vice President Foster, pulled a handkerchief from his breast pocket and wiped his forehead.  Cramming the handkerchief back into his breast pocket and straightening the knot of his tie he said, “Give me a moment.”  He went back to his desk and flicked a switch on the box on his desk and said, “Sally, bring me everything we have relating to Melissa Higgins.”  Then he turned to Special Agent Fleishman and said, “Can get you a coffee, soda, scotch and water?”

Special Agent Fleishman replied, “No thank you, I am just fine. But, don’t let me stop you if you do.” “That movie has to be 50 years old at this point and it still seems to represent something current that people sill fear.  We really ought to look into that,’ he thought.


About democratizemoney

Retired University Professor
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10 Responses to Campaign Update & 028 Special Agent Fleishman at Haphazard House (Agent Amanda Story)

  1. beetleypete says:

    Loved the way you weaved The Godfather reference in, Theo.

    The pie looked tasty enough to me. I would eat it…

    As for your forthcoming Congressional campaign, I think that the pony tail might have to go. I doubt you would be elected here with one. Not for any job, let alone Congressman. But then I could be wrong. It is America, after all.

    Best wishes, and a speedy recovery for Nancy, I hope.


    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you.
      As FR has reminded me from time to time, stories write themselves. When Special Agent Fleishman said “Exactly” I laughed out loud; and he further amazed me with his knowledge of films from the 1970s. The end of this segment opened the door for one of the Amandas to head up an investigation of the Mafia….
      We got into the pie last evening. Despite all the mistakes I made in putting it together, it tastes just fine. 🙂
      Thanks for the well wishes for Nancy. She missed a trip up north to a quilting event yesterday because of it. She is hoping to get to a class this morning. Cross your fingers.
      Yes, you are right even though this is the Pacific Northwest where pony tails and beards dominate. The problem is that after years with a pony tail I don’t even remember which side my hair parts on or how to comb it. 😦
      Warmest regards, Theo

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I do hope Nancy’s vertigo gets itself sorted, and that pie looks delicious. I am now realising you were not joking about getting into congress, no-one gets their pony-tail cut off for a joke. I hope VP Foster doesn’t find a horses head in his bed. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you.
      I think Nancy would do better if she got up an hour earlier, take her meds and then go back to bed. For it seems to wear off about 90 minutes after she takes both the preventative and the curative meds. It has been hitting her early on in the day. This may find a solution on Thursday when she gets into the ENT doctor. She had this for a month or so when we moved here. Then she saw an EMT and he diagnosed Ménière Disease. His prescriptions and her not ingesting much salt stopped it for close to ten years. So, I am hoping the EMT branch of modern medicine has more magic up its collective sleeves. Of course, it could be another cause this time. We shall see, Thursday early afternoon.
      The pestilence has both frightened me and raised my ire. The simplest thing to say about him is he is old enough to know how to behave much better than he is behaving. He acts like some spoiled rich kid whose parents always bail him out and cover up for him. It is not looking like the Republican Majorities in Congress are going to rid us of him; so, I will run; and if elected I will introduce the impeachment resolution myself. Then too there is the need to get money out of our political decision making process. I will draw attention to that with my Constitutional Amendment. Finally, we need to put equality in to the base of the economic system by democratizing money creation. Yes, change happens very slowly, but it has to start someplace. If nothing else, I will be a catalyst for that start. So, the pony tail goes.
      Foster cooperated, he knew if he didn’t he would awake one morning with a horse’s head in his bed. Smart man to cooperate.
      Warmest regards, Ed

      Liked by 1 person

      • Ed for Prez! I nearly wish I was American just so I could vote for you!

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you.
        Congress, Congress, not for Pres (although I am running against what he represents)
        Warmest regards, Ed

        Liked by 1 person

      • I presume to go into the House of representatives? Can you move on from there to be a senator or is that a different pathway?

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you.
        A seat in either the House or Senate is filled by elections to the seat. So, one chooses which of the seats one runs. One has to live in the state and district in which one run. It is possible if a vaccenyl occurs in the Senate for someone to fill it until the next election in some estates though an appointment by a state governor. But that is not a normal route to get to Congress. Often Members of the House, run for Senate Seats, it is considered more prestigious by some. House members are up for election every two years. Senators are up for reelection every six years.
        So, I guess they are different pathways.
        Warmest regards, Ed


  3. Eddy Winko says:

    Like FR I’d love to live in your State just to vote for you! Having nurtured my own ponytail for many years I eventually gave into the chop and a thriving business followed. Although I have to say I have tried and grow my hair long again every year since I no longer need to give an impression to anyone but the mirror, and then Gosia tells me to get it cut!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Eddy:
      We would love to have you living here (a guaranteed vote against the pestilence). Then too, I would welcome your vote. I think your approach to home building would be most competitive with the local methods. You would indeed give them a run for their money.
      Nancy is not enamored of my pony tail. Long hair ends up in the vacuum, sofa covers and places I swear I didn’t put my head. So, she, like Gosia does to you, whispers sweet nothings in my ear “cut it off.” I do think she means the pony tail. (I hope.) 🙂
      Warmest regards, Ed

      Liked by 1 person

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